Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Rule #1

One of my turtle-heads tends to favor a good lie (okay, any lie) over the truth.  As this caped teacher is, along with many others, able to discern a lie in the seconds before it is told, I find myself catching lies multiple times a day.  They are often little lies--"no I didn't put that book there" or "yes I did ask permission to use this pen." Some of them are bigger lies--"no I didn't steal this poem off of the internet and turn it in as my own" or "yes I do too have permission to walk home by myself in the dark."

This caped teacher's parents may laugh loudly at this, but I just want him to learn that the lie is not easier.  It seems easier before the telling, during the telling, and for a short while after the telling, but it is, in fact, much more difficult.  Many of us know this.  One of us learned this the hard way and over a long period of years telling lies to her parents.

V. is still learning this.  Years in foster care have not cured him of it.  I hesitate to say it may have made him more certain that lies are easier.  I would guess the lies feel safer on many levels.

The other day V. was presented with an opportunity to choose a lie over the truth.  The truth was easy and painless, the lie was... just that.  A lie.  I asked him for the truth, he lied  I asked him again and said (watch out... here it comes.... a new rule!)

"Lead with the truth, dude."

And he did.  He told the truth.  He did the next day too.  Then he lied again.  Either way, Rule #1 has been added to the list.

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